Items tagged with: Twitter

Even more tweets from my recent Twitter timeline

MAGICIAN: Is this your card?
MAGICIAN: Is this your card?
MAN: No. When is our regular postman back from holiday?

me: can Bigfoot mate with a Yeti
Google: ok one more then bedtime for real

"What colour would you call this?"
"What colour would you call this, o wise and beautiful identifier of colours?"

Do you, Karen, take David the Optometrist to be your lawfully wedded husband, for better or worse? Better... or worse? Better... or worse?

Actually, Jeff Bezos is the operating system - the robot is called Jeff Bez.

#humour #humor #joke #Twitter

Twitter introduces a Privacy Center to keep users informed | Engadget

Today, Twitter launched a Privacy Center, where it will share announcements, new privacy products and communication about inevitable security incidents. "By using Twitter, you've shown us that you trust us with your data," the Twitter Privacy Center states. "We do not take that trust lightly."
#technology #Twitter #privacy #security

‘The Anti-Facebook’: #Wikipedia co-founder launches ad-free #social #media platform

Fed up with #Facebook and #Twitter? If so, Wikipedia co-founder Jimmy Wales hopes you'll join WT:Social, a new social media platform that promises not to run advertisements or sell user data.

WT:Social features a Facebook-like feed on which users can share news or other content. But unlike Facebook, whose algorithms prioritize content that's sponsored or receiving a lot of engagement, WT:Social simply shows new content first.

About 160,000 people have signed up for WT:Social since it launched in October. The platform is free to join, but new users are put on a wait-list, which can be instantly bypassed if you donate money. WT:Social hopes to survive only on donations.
So why isn't he championing #Diaspora* / the #Federation? Hmmm...


Even more tweets from my recent Twitter timeline

If I was a plastic surgeon, my motto would be 'New nose is good nose'

cat: plays fiddle
cow: jumps over moon
dishes: run away
farmer: sets down bong

The font of all human knowledge is Univers Condensed.

Yes, I do get a high from brake fluid. But I can stop any time I like!

So it turns out 'confirmation bias' means exactly what I expected it to mean.
#humour #humor #Twitter
A great function for #Friendica or some addon would be to replace links in posts automatically with urls that are more protective of privacy.

Replace all twitter.com links with links to nitter.net, this is a pure replacement and will actually result in the same embedding.
So this https://twitter.com/shoushouswelt/status/1189534064103055360 becomes this https://nitter.net/shoushouswelt/status/1189534064103055360 and the embedding still works.

There is other services like that, I don't remember the #YouTube thing at them moment.

!Friendica Support #Twitter

More tweets from my recent Twitter timeline

Fool me once with your access to the spirit world, shaman you.
Fool me twice with your access to the spirit world, shaman me.

Give a man a fish & he'll say "what's this? I ordered chicken". Teach a man to fish & he's all "you're an awful waiter" & "get the manager".

I used to work in a water cooler factory. To be honest, we didn’t get much done.

Who called it Alcatraz and not Jailhouse Rock

Feed a duck some bread & he eats for a day. Teach a duck to speak, get a little suit & a job interview and I've lost my train of thought now

#humour #humor #Twitter

More tweets from my recent Twitter feed

My phone has just changed the word 'autocorrect' to 'custard trumpets'.
Damn you, custard trumpets.

I used to be friends with a guy who was a furniture decorator and a mime artist, and then one day he just varnished into thin air.

My flatmate has just earned a PhD in palindromes.
She'll now be known as Dr Awkward.

People who write "you couldn't make it up" are going to get a real shock when they learn about fiction.

"My dog does magic tricks."
"Really? What breed is he?"
"He's a labracadabrador."

#humour #humor #Twitter

More tweets from my recent Twitter timeline

My girlfriend just said I was rubbish at describing her. She's got a cheek.

The bell on my bike has broken so I've attached a peashooter to alert people when I'm coming. I call it my no bell pea surprise.

The police aren’t doing enough to stop the rise of vigilantism. I think it’s time we took matters into our own hands.

A cat's main defence?
Get out claws.

Just helped my granddad to update his Excel spreadsheet, he looked all nostalgic and said "I remember when all this was just fields".

#humour #humor #Twitter
Some recent tweets from my Twitter timeline

I know it doesn't sound like fun, but rolling lentils down a drain pipe to see which comes out first will set your pulses racing.

If pronouncing my b's as v's makes me sound Russian, then soviet.

Apparently people are saying I’m obsessed with parenting. Well, it’s high time those rumours were put to bed.

Knorr should introduce a dressing called Knorr Vinaigrette Rien.

No one ever talks about how an oubliette implies the existence of a larger, and far more terrifying, oobly.

#humour #humor #Twitter
There is no way to mirror a #Twitter account in #Friendica for Twitter accounts that you don't own and if you just want to mirror the text and photo from that account?

Tipps how to do this?

!Friendica Support

Some tweets from my recent Twitter timeline

To whoever stole my glasses this morning... I will find you. I have contacts.

Just learned the tragic story of Amelia Earhart the first woman with ears for a heart

@fro_vo: me:
it doesn’t have a tail so i’m pretty sure it’s a hamster
tech support: okay fine right-click the hamster

[first Tinder date]
Me: I just think if there's a group in your bio picture, you should clarify which one is you
Date: Sorry, everyone else assumes I'm the man HOLDING the fish

Me: I know this is short notice but can I take the rest of the day off?
Job interviewer: What?

#humour #Twitter
Would it be possible to exempt reshares in #Friendica from beeiing posted to #Twitter. Reshares look ugly on #Twitter.

!Friendica Support

Twitter just turned lists into multiple timelines you can swipe between | The Verge

Twitter is now letting users add up to five lists as alternative timelines in the main Twitter app, allowing you to quickly swipe between different groups of accounts directly from your home screen.

The company tested the feature back in June, but it’s rolling it out to everyone on iOS starting today. Check the tweet here for a better look at how the multiple lists actually work in practice.
iOS only so far.

#technology #SocialMedia #social #Twitter

Anti-extremism group run by social media giants becomes independent | Engadget

A group formed by Facebook, Microsoft, Twitter and YouTube to combat terrorist abuse and online extremism on social media is becoming a separate organization. The Global Internet Forum to Counter Terrorism has announced today that it plans on hiring an executive director and separate staff to lead the initiative, which was formed a little more than two years ago. Also joining the initiative will be Amazon, Whatsapp and Linkedin.
#technology #SocialMedia #security #extremism #GIFCT #Facebook #Microsoft #Twitter #YouTube #Amazon #WhatsApp #LinkedIn

One more handful of tweets from my Twitter timeline

Jesus: my child, when there was only one set of footprints, Fred Flintstone was driving.

Do you know what's more embarrassing than having 'Another One Bites the Dust' as a ringtone?
Not putting your phone on silent at a funeral.

There's a special place in Hull reserved for the inventor of autocorrect.

6yo: mom, who sings this?
Me: Queen
6yo: can you let them sing it
Me: damn
My job here is done he's ready

"Do you like Tolstoy?"
"Of course. Who doesn't?"
"What's your favourite book?"
"The one where Woody is kidnapped & Buzz tries to save him".

#humour #joke #Twitter

* Cerveaux non disponibles * #twitter

Cinq panneaux publicitaires consommant à eux seuls plus d'énergie que quinze logements familiaux diffusent dans un hall de gare désert un message incitant à la sobriété énergétique par le renouvellement de son équipement électroménager...

Quand le #CapitalismeVert touche le fond.


Source : https://twitter.com/CerveauxNon/status/1168114324868669443

#publicité #gaspillage #agression publicitaire #inutilité #enMarche #gare

* Cerveaux non disponibles * #twitter

Cinq panneaux publicitaires consommant à eux seuls plus d'énergie que quinze logements familiaux diffusent dans un hall de gare désert un message incitant à la sobriété énergétique par le renouvellement de son équipement électroménager...

Quand le #CapitalismeVert touche le fond.


Source : https://twitter.com/CerveauxNon/status/1168114324868669443

#publicité #gaspillage #agression publicitaire #inutilité #enMarche #gare

Even more tweets from my Twitter timeline

I’m thinking of turning off autocorrect.
It’s developed a mine of its owl.


[shopping]ME: how are you?
CLERK: just fine and you?
ME: great and you?
CLERK: good, you?
ME: realizing I'm now trapped in this loop forever living the dream, you?
CLERK: also stuck, crying I'm good, you?

I have a tin that looks nothing like a tin. It's uncanny

ME: [finding hidden compartment] OMG what the heck is this?
WIFE: The washing machine

My wife asked me to stop impersonating a flamingo.
I had to put my foot down.

#humour #joke #Twitter

Yet another handful of recent tweets from my Twitter timeline

Shocked to just learn from my doctor that I'm colour-blind. It came completely out of the green.

[first day as a pilot]
me: looking down nervously what are all these buttons for
co-pilot: they keep your shirt closed

I had my doubts about campanology, but I tell you, seeing is bell heaving.

Cop: before I search your pockets is there anything I should be aware of?
Me: we brush our teeth with hair on a stick and brush our hair with teeth on a stick
Cop: on radio get the feds

me: someone we know is possessed by an owl
friend: who?
me: [narrows eyes]

#humour #joke #Twitter
"Twitter said Monday it suspended hundreds of accounts that are believed to be tied to a 'significant state-backed information campaign' originating from inside China."

"The company suspended 936 accounts that are thought to be related to the activity. Twitter said the disinformation campaign was designed to 'sow political discord in Hong Kong, including undermining the legitimacy and political protest movement on the ground'."

#Twitter #China #HongKong #propaganda

Twitter’s latest test lets users subscribe to a tweet’s replies | TechCrunch

The company’s latest test, announced via a tweet ahead of the weekend, will allow users to subscribe to replies to a particularly interesting tweet they want to follow, too, in order to see how the conversation progresses. The feature is designed to complement the existing notifications feature you may have turned on for your “must-follow” accounts.
#technology #internet #SocialMedia #Twitter
Twitter’s latest test lets users subscribe to a tweet’s replies

Twitter is testing a snooze feature to let you pause push notifications | The Verge

Twitter is testing a new feature that lets you snooze notifications from its app for a short period of time. The feature, which was discovered by app researcher Jane Manchun Wong in the code for Twitter’s Android app, allows you to pause push notifications for one, three, or 12 hours at a time. This will prevent the app from generating push notifications, but you’ll still be able to see them inside the app’s notification menu.
#technology #internet #mobile #Twitter

Twitter may have shared your data without permission | Engadget

Yesterday, Twitter came clean about a data mishap. According to the company, it may have shared data it didn't have permission to with advertisers. It may have also made assumptions about what device you use, again without permission.
#technology #internet #mobile #Twitter #security

Twitter launches the ‘Hide Replies’ feature, in hopes of civilizing conversations | TechCrunch

Twitter today is beginning its test of a radical and controversial change to its service with the launch of a new “Hide Replies” feature. Effectively, this option gives users the ability to wrestle back control over a conversation they’ve started by hiding any replies they feel aren’t worthy contributions — for example, replies that are irrelevant or outright offensive.
#technology #internet #twitter
Twitter launches the ‘Hide Replies’ feature, in hopes of civilizing conversations

How to Switch Back to the Old Twitter Layout | Bleeping Computer

If the new interface has been rolled out to your account and you are not happy with it, you will be happy to learn that there is a trick that can get you back to the old version.
#technology #internet #twitter

Twitter is down

HN Discussion: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=20414407
Posted by idlewords (karma: 20941)
Post stats: Points: 354 - Comments: 246 - 2019-07-11T19:01:24Z

\#HackerNews #down #twitter
HackerNewsBot debug: Calculated post rank: 318 - Loop: 66 - Rank min: 100 - Author rank: 65

Wikipedia co-founder slams Mark Zuckerberg, Twitter and the ‘appalling’ internet

HN Discussion: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=20362266
Posted by L_226 (karma: 326)
Post stats: Points: 131 - Comments: 80 - 2019-07-05T13:17:14Z

\#HackerNews #and #appalling #co-founder #internet #mark #slams #the #twitter #wikipedia #zuckerberg
HackerNewsBot debug: Calculated post rank: 114 - Loop: 217 - Rank min: 100 - Author rank: 26

** Twitter tests out another desktop redesign with trends on the right, navigation on the left | TechCrunch**

It was in January that Twitter announced that it would be rolling out a new, simplified desktop redesign to its users. Hopefully, no one was holding their breath for the big official reveal. Six months later, we can confirm that Twitter is… still rolling out tests as it tinkers with a new look for its Twitter.com desktop interface.
Twitter (listening to its users): 🙉

#technology #internet #Twitter
Twitter tests out another desktop redesign with trends on the right, navigation on the left

“Twitter has an algorithm that creates harassment all by itself”

HN Discussion: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=20287887
Posted by cwyers (karma: 9648)
Post stats: Points: 127 - Comments: 56 - 2019-06-26T18:40:35Z

\#HackerNews #algorithm #all #creates #harassment #has #itself #that #twitter
HackerNewsBot debug: Calculated post rank: 103 - Loop: 209 - Rank min: 100 - Author rank: 39

Twitter is rejecting posts containing JSFiddle URLs

HN Discussion: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=20122583
Posted by NikxDa (karma: 69)
Post stats: Points: 102 - Comments: 48 - 2019-06-07T08:07:48Z

\#HackerNews #containing #jsfiddle #posts #rejecting #twitter #urls
HackerNewsBot debug: Calculated post rank: 84 - Loop: 63 - Rank min: 80 - Author rank: 86

Large number of Twitter accounts critical of China suspended

HN Discussion: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=20070605
Posted by lawrenceyan (karma: 1868)
Post stats: Points: 141 - Comments: 22 - 2019-06-01T18:20:36Z

\#HackerNews #accounts #china #critical #large #number #suspended #twitter
HackerNewsBot debug: Calculated post rank: 101 - Loop: 205 - Rank min: 100 - Author rank: 33

Twitter accounts are being hijacked for spam

HN Discussion: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=20014388
Posted by edent (karma: 10152)
Post stats: Points: 130 - Comments: 43 - 2019-05-26T11:38:38Z

\#HackerNews #accounts #are #being #for #hijacked #spam #twitter
HackerNewsBot debug: Calculated post rank: 101 - Loop: 370 - Rank min: 100 - Author rank: 75
Warning - do not click on Twitter ads
Chemnitz-Update: In Chemnitz gibt es am Montag ein Open-Air-Konzert gegen rechts mit Acts wie den Toten Hosen, Marteria & Casper, KIZ, Feine Sahne Fischfilet und Kraftklub, die das wohl auch angeleiert haben.
Und wer nicht so auf Musik steht: Heute ab 9 Uhr werden in Chemnitz an neun Orten insgesamt 19 Stolpersteine verlegt. Falls jemand also gerade in Chemnitz ist und Solidarität zeigen will: Geht da hin und feiert die Aktion.

"At a Twitter all-hands meeting on March 22, an employee asked a blunt question: Twitter has largely eradicated Islamic State propaganda off its platform. Why can't it do the same for white supremacist content? An executive responded by explaining that Twitter follows the law, and a technical employee who works on machine learning and artificial intelligence issues went up to the mic to add some context."

"With every sort of content filter, there is a tradeoff, he explained. When a platform aggressively enforces against ISIS content, for instance, it can also flag innocent accounts as well, such as Arabic language broadcasters. Society, in general, accepts the benefit of banning ISIS for inconveniencing some others, he said. In separate discussions verified by Motherboard, that employee said Twitter hasn't taken the same aggressive approach to white supremacist content because the collateral accounts that are impacted can, in some instances, be Republican politicians. The employee argued that, on a technical level, content from Republican politicians could get swept up by algorithms aggressively removing white supremacist material. Banning politicians wouldn't be accepted by society as a trade-off for flagging all of the white supremacist propaganda, he argued."

#GOP #WhiteSupremacy #Twitter
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